Today I was talking with a girlfriend about how do you know if the boy you like (or love) is "the one."
I used to hate it when people would say, "When you know you know." Well unfortunately they all say it because it's true. You will know. Like in your gut know that you know.
So I guess the better question is: how do you know that you know?
For me it was a very clear and specific difference from all the other guys I thought or hoped I knew. The difference...
All the other guys: I would often have to convince myself and others that this was the right relationship. That this guy was it. I was constantly having to talk well of him to make myself believe he was the best one for me. To hope that others would be persuaded to.
Chris: I would often try to convince myself that he wasn't the one. Silly sounding I know, but it had never been so right before. There was no doubt. None. And the most shocking part of all, there was no doubt from anyone else in my life. None. No one had a slight objection. (That part is key, those that are for you aren't looking at the relationship with emotional strings attached.)
On top of all that Chris met all my qualifications.
In college I threw away the list. Yes I totally had a 2 page front and back list before that, complete with a bonus list. Wow. But give me a break, I was 19.
And instead had two requirements, and made no execptions on these items:
1. Someone who ran at the same pace after Jesus as me. We are all at different places in our pursuit of Christ. I didn't care if someone had walked consistently with the Lord since they were 4 or if it had been a couple of years (probably wouldn't suggest someone who hasn't been walking consistently for longer than a couple of years... it would be for their good to get established).
2. Not handicapped by his past/baggage. As I heard a speaker say recently, I didn't just come with baggage, but I came with a complete set of luggage plus a few carry ons! So I had no expectations for someone to be baggage free. We are human. However, I did want someone that wasn't handicapped by their baggage/past. See the difference?
So that was it. That was how I knew.
What about you?
If you are married, how did you know?
If you are single, how have yo known that he wasn't? What are your thoughts about what I said?