Me v. The Nurses

I had to just share some stories with you all real quick.

Can you tell I'm waiting very "patiently" to get discharged? ;)

Story #1: C-Section Tomorrow

Last night our nurse came in to introduce herself as her shift started and she said: "Hi my name is ______. So I hear we are having an c-section tomorrow?"

Surely my face changed colors a little and I said: "Umm... I was under the impression I was being discharged tomorrow."

Then she laughed and said: "Oh my goodness, I got you and the lady next door mixed up."

Of course I thought it was funny too and laughed, but quickly told her: "Just don't make the same mistake in the morning!" :)

Story #2: Lots of Moms have their Showers in the Hospital

I have my first shower tomorrow! Being checked in on Wednesday made me start to wonder if I was going to be able to have that shower still.

So being the patient person I am I decided to wait till my doctor came back to ask him. Totally kidding. I decided to ask the nurse what she thought:

Me: "When do you think I'll be discharged?"
Nurse: "Well your fever is pretty high, depending on your test results and if you fever adjusts and how your baby is doing will depend on when you are discharged. But usually with a fever as high as yours you would stay at least 72 hours."
Me: (thinking: that would have me discharged just as my shower was ending) "Well I have a shower on Saturday that I really don't want to miss."
Nurse: "Oh that's not a problem! Lots of moms move their showers to the hospital, we even have a special room you can use."
Me: (not impressed, but of course keeping a friendly tone) "Well _____, just to give you a heads up, if I'm not discharged before then, you will have an escapee on your hands!"
(then we both laughed)

P.S. The shower is still on. :)

Story #3: Interpretive Dancing

When you are admitted to the hospital while they are getting you settled into your room with IVs and such, they ask you a million and one questions.

Questions like: Does your husband abuse you? Do you feel safe?
You know, the basic get to know you questions. ;)

Well, since I like to have fun with my nurses and try to get on their good side early I had fun answering the religious section questions:

Nurse: "What religion are you: Christian, Muslim, atheist..."
Me: "Christian"
Nurse: "Any specific denomination: Baptist, Methodist..."
Me: "Baptist"
Nurse: "Is there anything specific that we can do to support you beliefs"
(she had no clue what she was asking me)
Me: (straight face) "Yes. I would really appreciate it if you could do an interpretive dance every hour."
Nurse: (not sure whether to laugh or not)
Me: (laughing) "I'm totally kidding"
Nurse: (now confident to laugh) "I'm writing it in the notes anyway. The other nurses will appreciate it."

Important note for anyone every being admitted to a hospital: Your nurse needs to become your new favorite person. I personally believe it's more important to have your nurse on your side than your doctor. :) I'm just sayin'. Get to know them, make friends, ask about their families, ask to see pictures, make jokes... even if you are in pain.

If you didn't know, I was in the hospital: Scroll down and read on, it's been quite a week!