My Journal on November 25, 2009

November 25, 2009
"...Finally, but not lastly, we want to create a family this year.
Lord, I want a miracle! I believe you can
and will overcome all my health issues!
Please Lord bring us a baby soon!

Then in my reading plan that day I came to Mathew 17:14-21.

"When they came to the crowd, a man approached Jesus and knelt before him. “Lord, have mercy on my son,” he said. “He has seizures and is suffering greatly. He often falls into the fire or into the water. I brought him to your disciples, but they could not heal him.” “You unbelieving and perverse generation,” Jesus replied, “how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy here to me.” Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment. Then the disciples came to Jesus in private and asked, “Why couldn’t we drive it out?” He replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”

Then I continued journaling...

"Lord, I feel like this was a word straight to me after journaling about wanting to get pregnant. Your Word gave me the answer: HAVE FAITH!! Not that it's a surprise-- but it's all I need to do. Lord, I know and believe that you not only can heal me and give me a child, but I know you will. In Jesus Name I beg it of you..."

And then just a few weeks later...

December 6, 2009
"I'm PREGNANT!! LORD, you did it! A miracle! I wanted so desperately for a miracle-- the first month of trying. And it happened. I had such little faith..."

I hesitated to even share this.
I don't want to give false hope to others. I don't want to make others bitter.

I've been there. So many more times God's answer has been "no," "not now," or "not quite as you think." So sometimes I've heard stories like this and wondered, "God, why can't that be me? Have you totally forgotten me?!"

As believers especially, we need to share when God has been faithful!
When He's been faithful when our faith has been weak.
When He's been faithful to give us our very desire.
When He's been faithful to give us the opposite of what we desired.

We named her Karis because of the meaning-- grace.
She is a gift of grace to us. I didn't know if I'd ever get to have a baby. God has totally blown me away with her. On the fussiest days (like the past couple of weeks), my heart still bursts with thankfulness at the sight of her. I love her so.

I wrote in my journal on November 25, 2009.
Little did I know..
I had conceived Karis the day before.

How about you?
What's a way you have seen God be faithful in your life
(either in a yes, not now or no)?